So much to update!

September 22, 2008 at 6:54 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | 7 Comments

I am going to do this with bullet points because its just easier!

*Friday we found out that we have to have a “home” before we go to Nashville for the adoption. Our new social worker in Texas has to come out and redo our homestudy this week. We were thinking this could be done when we got back. πŸ™‚ By the grace of God we already had a deposit down on the apt we wanted and they let us move in within 24 hours of that phone call. You can guess what we have been doing all weekend!! I am so excited to have our baby bed and changing table put together!!

*With this new information regarding our homestudy I had to make a very hard decision about Haiti. I knew our social worker was coming out to redo our homestudy and us moving into a new place that it would have been impossible for me to go to Haiti with Jamie this time. We had this trip planned way before we ever got chosen. Its so hard to know that Jamie is walking around Haiti right now and I am not with her.

*One week from today we will be driving to Tennessee!! Its getting crazy close. We are so excited and counting down the days

*I am doing ok with everything. The closer we get the more afraid I become. My days literally consist of me praying/journaling, reading my Bible, trusting, resting, getting up, doing stuff, start worrying again, surrender everything again, journal more, get busy again, start worrying, sit down and trust again and so on. It is getting harder the closer it gets. Everytime I go to God, He is constantly pushing me to trust and rest. Everytime! He just tells me to trust and that He loves me over and over again.

*Here are my fears- I am in love with this child and I long to bring him home to the place we have prepared for him but I am scared of getting hurt. I am more afraid that she will make the wrong decision and hurt for the rest of her life. I have to just pray and leave it there with God. I love adoption but it is sooooo hard!!!!!! Nobody ever said it was easy! I think I am just ready for the chance to meet her. I have to know that God is in control of everyone’s hearts and I am walking right beside him even though it is scary. He is with me and it is so evident!

*When we see him for the first time I want my heart to be fully ready to love. I don’t want to hold back because of fear. I am working towards that. I want to love for as long as we have him. Whether it be for 2 days or for the rest of his life. I know that he is not ours until those papers are signed and the time period is up but I am going to love that child for as long as we have him. (Do I say the same things over and over again in these posts? I think I do but its just good for me to get it all out.) I am very close to this- I just have to keep pushing to get there.

*I am just praying that our mom knows we will take care of this baby as our own. I don’t want her to worry about whether we will love this baby or not. I am just praying that God gives her peace about that in her decision making process.

*The reason I tell you all this is because I want to be honest through this process. I WANT people to learn and adopt because there are so many kids out there that need us! I don’t want to sugar coat anything because its not easy but I know it will all be worth it and I would do it all over again!

*Please pray that our homestudy gets done in time.

*Please pray for all of our hearts. There are so many emotions in all of this.

*Please pray for our stinking house to sell. For the love!!!

*Oh I forgot- We love our new apt!!! It is so homey already and Steven and I are having a blast putting it all together. We love it so much! πŸ™‚ I look forward to having people over and cooking for them. I look forward to having a place to where our friends and family can come and stay with us. We are sad that we will only be able to stay for a week and then leave for a month! Its nice to have a home. πŸ™‚

Alright- I think that is enough updates for now! We will let you know what is coming in the next couple of weeks!!

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7 Comments »

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  1. I am praying for you so much! I’ve written your name on little post-its and placed them around my house. You’re on my prayer board too πŸ™‚ I am so happy for you–just genuinely, purely happy!! I can’t wait for you to be a Mama–you’re going to be wonderful. I love how honest you are on your blog. I love that you are desiring to love this little boy with your whole heart–no matter the outcome. We are praying for miracles on all sides. Love you so much!!
    ps…i’m sorry you didn’t get to go to Haiti. I know that was a tough decision.
    pps…can’t wait to see pics of your new apartment!

  2. I am soooo excited for you, SOOOO excited! Will you please call me as soon as possible when you get here? If you have time of course but we are leaving for Texas on the 3rd so I would really like to hook-up with you and see baby August if possible…oh I am so psyched!!!

    As for Haiti…I cannot even imagine your emotion right now…I love you!

  3. i am praying so hard for you guys this next week!

  4. (We don’t actually know each other, but I went to high school with Ginger and started following your blog from hers)
    Thank you so much for your honesty through this process. I am so excited for you and can’t wait to read the updates to come! Your love and respect for the baby’s mother is expressed so well here. I am praying for your family in the midst of all the joy, doubt, and craziness!
    -Vanessa

  5. Hello dear friend! I’m so sorry that you aren’t in Haiti right now, but with all the craziness I’m sure you made the smart choice, even if it wasn’t the easy one. I’m praying so much for you and Steven this week and also for Baby August’s birth mother. I can’t wait to see you and hug you real big! Let me know if you need anything while you’re here! Love you!

  6. thinking about you guys, maris. πŸ™‚ i’m sorry haiti didn’t work out but obviously timing is not something anyone can control and it sounds like you are doing great, given the circumstances. hope the next few days give you even more time to prepare and grow as you face the newness of everything that is to come.

    love you!

  7. Hi Maris, I am so very happy for you guys! I had no idea you guys where this close to becoming parents! Wow new city and new baby, it happens so fast! I keep you guys in my thoughts on the new baby I can’t wait to see pictures. Believe me we are doing some serious praying down here that your house sells SOON!


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