April 27, 2008 at 1:42 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 4 Comments

TODAY is Steven and Ginger’s birthday. How fun is it to have your husband and your best friends birthday on the same day? They are both 28! So old now. So much wiser!

Here are 28 things I love about the both of them!

28. I love that Ginger’s sinus’ are constantly running and she always is sniffing it up really loud.

27. I love Steven’s really bad breath in the mornings.

26. I love Ginger’s sweaty feet and her small toe nails.

25. I love Steven’s pickiness about shoes. “One foot is bigger than the other.”

24. I love Ginger’s crazy hair that she doesn’t wash for 2 weeks but always seems to look amazing.

23. I love that Steven is so weird about how his bags have to be packed.

22. I love that Ginger has such a big smile!

21. I love Steven’s big hugs. They make me feel like the world is ok.

20. I love going to walmart with Ginger. We can always find something really cheap and make it cute.

19. I love Steven’s heart for his family and how he longs to be more apart of their lives.

18. I love Ginger’s heart for her family. She sticks by them and loves them.

17. I love Steven’s laundry that is laying around the house that him or I just folded. I just like it being close.

16. I love that I might be getting to see Ginger this summer!

15. I love how Steven doesn’t snore at night!

14. I love that Ginger snores at night!

13. I love Steven’s ability to change his style every 3 months. He has something “new” that he is wearing. Just watch.

12. I love that Ginger wear’s flip flops 347 days out of the year!

11. I love that Steven has a country back ground. I love seeing it pop out every now and then!

10. I love that Ginger and I could share clothes. I want that again!

9. I love that Steven is so supportive of who I am and dreams that I have. He wants me to be a stay at home mom and is fighting for that.

8. I love that Ginger chases her dreams. Even if it takes her to another state.

7. I love Steven’s heart for the world. Not just America. He has taught me so much.

6. I love that Ginger is about to experience Haiti. I can’t wait to hear what comes out of her after her trip.

5. I love that Steven watches my favorite shows with me and loves them too in secret!

4. I love that Ginger and I have know each other for so long that we can’t remember the first time we met.

3. I love getting to know Steven more everyday. Its crazy to think how we have grown since our honeymoon.

2. I love Ginger for the best friend that she will always be in my life. I love walking through each stage of our lives together. I love watching her struggle and have victories in her life. I love to see how she is trusting God and how He is blessing her. I love how patient she is. She teaches me so much about patience.

1. I love that Steven is truly my soulmate. He is the being that is beside me through everything. He is the best picture of God’s love in my life. He loves me and is patient even when he doesn’t want to be. I love seeing talents pour out of him. I love watching God use him. I love watching him struggle and fight to be a man of God. I love seeing his desire to be a dad continue to grow. He has so much to offer a child. I love you babe.


I feel that a breakdown might be on its way…

April 27, 2008 at 1:00 am | Posted in adoption, Life, love, My Husband, Updates | 6 Comments

You know when you have a lot going on and you keep trying to tuck it away and not think about it but you know the more you tuck it away it keeps getting bigger and bigger? I have been feeling this way for the last couple of weeks. Our stress level seems to keep rising. I feel like God is standing in front of me and handing me one tennis ball at a time, trying to see how many I can hold. It was fine a month ago but he keeps handing them to me to hold and they are piling higher and higher and I am waiting for them to fall and spill out all over the floor.

*This adoption process is more emotionally draining than what I thought. We are trying to push through and get it done before Steven leaves for the summer but it has been so hard to get it pushed through. I feel like I am constantly looking at the calendar and the days are drawing in closer and closer. I look at how many days we have left before her leaves.

*We still have a lot of money to pay towards this adoption. Enough said.

*Steven and I both need dental work done. His is Monday- I need to go in next week and find out why my tooth is hurting. Not normal.

*There is another thing in our lives that I am stressed about but more to come on that later.

*My sweet friends are heading to Haiti in 5 days. This has lots of things that bring emotions with it. A) I am not going. Boo. I wish I was going. B) The Iveys are going to see their kids again, Aaron for the first time. I wish I was going to be there to experience that with them. I hate that we won’t be there. C) My Ginger is going to Haiti for the first time. I am so excited that she is going. I wish I was there to experience it with her. All in all SOOOOOOOO excited for them all. They will have a great trip that will again change their lives for the first time or again in some way. Did you get that I am sad that I am not going?

*I am wondering how long it will be before I hold a sweet baby that could potentially be mine. I count days and estimate when I think it could be. I dream about his/her eyes, cheeks, fingers and toes. I think about how much they will weigh and get excited about feeding, watching them sleep, hearing them scream at the top of their lungs and changing crazy diapers. I want to spend most of my time taking care of something else. I keep reading “Baby Wise” and getting so excited and figuring out what I should expect. I am counting days and hours and hoping it is coming soon. Oh God please don’t make us wait for a long time! That is the cry of my heart right now but I know that there are so many others out there that have been waiting a lot longer than we have. I am trying to figure out how to wear this suit of waiting. I can’t get it to fit the way it is supposed to.

*Steven leaves in 37 days. Enough said.

This in NO WAY is a blog about me complaining about my life. I honestly have never felt more free than I do now. I LOVE where we are. We have no idea what the heck we are doing, where we are going and what we will be experiencing! I am trying with everything to trust God with all these tennis balls that he is stacking in my arms. I am learning so much. There are just a lot of emotions right now. I am trying to enjoy today. It remind me of that song we learned at church when we were little.

“This is the day. This is the day. That the Lord has made. That the Lord has made.  I will rejoice. I will rejoice, and be glad in it. And be glad in it. This is the day that the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it. This is the day. This is the day that the Lord has made!”

How stinkin true is that song? How hard is it to live it? Thank you Lord for cheesy church songs that I learned when I was little that come back to my head as an adult! I have secretly been singing this song in my head for the last week. I will keep singing for fear that if I stop singing I will break down and all of these emotions spill out on an innocent bystander!!

random facts from me!

April 24, 2008 at 4:06 am | Posted in adoption, My Husband, Updates | 3 Comments

Hello all- sorry its been so long but here are some random facts going on in our lives!

* TOMORROW morning (Thursday) we have our first couples apt with Bethany for our adoption! We are o so excited! One step closer! After this we will have our couples interviews, our home visit and make our profile and you guessed it- we will be waiting for approval and to be chosen! I feel as if we are seeing light at the end of the tunnel here.

* Last night just for kicks we went and registered at Babies R Us!! You can go to their website and browse around to see all the fun stuff we registered for!

* I am in to girl V-necks right now. I don’t know why. I love them

*Steven is about to dye my hair- I love that I have a husband that will do this for me!! I love him so so much.

*Ok I will give you more later but i am off to get my hair done!

Am I a Christ follower? Are you?

April 13, 2008 at 6:28 pm | Posted in adoption, Church, Life, love, Thoughts on God | 9 Comments

Matthew 25:32-46

“Before him will be gathered all nations, and he will separate people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. And he will place the sheep on his right, but the goats on the left. Then the King will say to those on his right, “Come , you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me and I was naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me. Then the righteous will answer him, saying Lord when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and gave you drink? And when did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? And when did we see you sick or in prison and visit you? And the king will answer them, Truly I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers you did it to me.

Then he will say to those on his left, depart from me you cursed into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and you have me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not clothe me, sick and in prison and you did not visit me. Then they also will answer saying, Lord when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to you? Then he will answer them, saying, Truly I say to you as you did not do it to me. And these will go away to enternal punishment, but the righteous into eternal life.”

Alright- so what do we do with this? This passage raises so many questions in my mind. Is this the true essence of christianity? Have I been missing it? I thought you just had to acknowledge Jesus with your lips, believe in your heart that He is the son of God and then you will be saved. Maybe that is the beginning and this passage above is what our lives are to be about from that point on. This is pretty stinkin clear huh? All I see in my life is sin. It is me missing the mark with all of this. If we are not doing this and we call ourselves a “christian” are we really? If we are not feeding the hungry, clothing them, taking them into our households, visiting them are we really a christian? What is righteousness? Is it staying away from these people because they are “sinners” or “dangerous?” Is it evaluating motives of these people? Is it ignoring a homeless man because he stinks, because he is a little scary and might spend money in a way that we will not approve of? Is righteousness living life with them and trying to find Jesus in their faces? After reading this I want to move to Haiti even more. There are things I can do today to live this out. How does this passage affect you? What does it say to you? How can we ignore this part of scripture??

Places of work…

April 10, 2008 at 3:31 am | Posted in Work | 4 Comments

Do you ever walk into a store/office/place of work and wonder how people work in that environment day in and day out? I would think we would all have those places in mind of where we would NEVER want to work. I think that looks different for every personality. I am sure some would NEVER want to work at an OB/GYN office like I do. Its fine for now. Not my perminant home. It pays the bills until our baby is here! Tonight I walked in to a place and honestly everytime I go in I cringe of the thought of working there. What is yours?

Mine is WALGREEN’S!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So so so boring. Oh my gosh.

For all you Verizon’s

April 8, 2008 at 2:02 am | Posted in Updates | 4 Comments

Well for those of you that I have been talking to and enjoying free Verizon to Verizon our time has come to an end. My husband has stolen me away to At&T now. You don’t have to stop calling though. Sorry mom 😦 My number is still the same. Hope everyone is having a great week!

There is something missing

April 4, 2008 at 3:55 am | Posted in adopting august, adoption, Family, God, Life, My Husband, Updates | 6 Comments

I am feeling very different lately. I think I am getting a little freaked out at how close we are getting in this adoption. The agency has been sending out reference letters and everybody is telling me that they have gotten them and are sending them back in already. We have our marital counseling in the morning. Things are just working like a well oiled machine right now and I can only think that God is moving. I feel like His hands are all in this and He is moving this very quickly.

Since the day we got married, its always been just Steven and I. We have loved our precious time together! That time won’t stop just because we are adding to the family. He is such an amazing man and I find something to fall deeper in love with inside of him everyday. There is something missing though. Its like the Grinch- I feel like our hearts are growing! I can tell that we are both longing for this child. I am just starting to feel like there is something missing from us. The other day (I work at a hospital) I walked to the newborn nursery and just stood there looking through the windows at the babies. It was quiet in the hall and I just wanted to watch their little bodies and how they moved, cried, yawned and slept. It just made me feel closer.

I hear people say occasionally, “What if that baby is placed with you and you don’t feel close to that child because they haven’t grown in you and you have never seen them before.” I am NOT trying to be cheesy but since last August when God called us to move forward with this adoption I feel as if this child has been growing inside of me. Its in a different way but I have been bonding with the fact that we want to have a child ever since. I am ready. I am ready to love on any child that God places with us for the amount of time that they are with us. Even if that mom changes her mind we will love that child for however long we have them. My heart genuinely feels 8 months pregnant!

I love being an option for girls/women who get themselves into a situation that maybe they didn’t intend to get into. I am so thankful that there are positive options. Not all adoptions are healthy but I am determined to make this a healthy adoption! I really want this child’s mom to be a part of our lives if she chooses to do so. Ultimately I want to show Jesus in this entire situation. He loves. He provides. He nurtures. He heals. He has brought us as Gentiles into His family and made us sons and daughters. My heart overflows for women who are pregnant and are overwhelmed. First and best option is always to parent! If she chooses not to we would love to be a loving option for her. I just think about her all the time. Please pray for these women/girls today. Some of them are faced with very hard decisions.

We will keep you updated with where things are going. Hopefully we can be “waiting officially” within the next month. That is the goal.

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